Christmas Memories

 It's Christmas morning. I remember growing up in our modest home with my siblings, excited and anxious for the day to arrive when we could open our presents. The evergreen scent was strong, and our tree was trimmed with colored light bulbs (they really were bulbs), silver icicles which we painstakingly separated and hung with care on the branches, and fragile round ornaments which shattered in our hand if we didn't handle them carefully. I honestly don't remember asking Santa for any special gifts, and we were happy with what we received. As an adult looking back on my childhood, I know that my parents must have saved frugally throughout the year in order to provide us five kids with gifts. Back then, Christmas was a time to celebrate the birth of Jesus and a time for our family to enjoy the special holiday together. 

When I became a wife and a mom, Christmas took on a new meaning. Now we were setting new traditions as a family. Like many young middle-class families, we were struggling a bit but wanted to make this day special for our sons. So we made our home festive, sang Christmas carols, read stories about the meaning of this special day, and had them select gifts for each other. (Read about this special gift from Jarand to Justin here.)  Of our three sons, Jordan was the only one who believed in Santa. He rarely cried as a youngster, but the day when he realized that Santa wasn’t a real person, he was inconsolable. 

I’m glad we took these photos of our first Christmases:

Our first Christmas as husband and wife in 1977. Randy and I were renting a 2-bedroom condo in Pearlridge and had a small tree that fit in our small living room. I handcrafted several of the ornaments; I still have them today.

I was pregnant with Justin; he was supposed to be born in early January but surprised us on December 28.

Justin’s first Christmas in 1978. We were still living in the condo. 

Jarand’s second Christmas in 1980. By then, we were living in our first home in Mililani.

Jordan’s 2nd Christmas; he was 18 months old. This is our present home. Notice that the tree is much more festive. 

When the boys were growing up and Randy was in politics, we started a tradition of having one of our sons design our annual Christmas card. In those days, we sent out hundreds of cards so it was a family affair with everyone chipping in to put the cards into envelopes, putting on a stamp (no self-stick back then) and mailing label, and getting them mailed out in time. (Read about our card designs here.) Today, that is probably my favorite family Christmas memory.

The boys grew up, and before we knew it, Randy and I were empty-nesters. Justin has a family of his own, and eventually moved to the mainland. When our grandsons were little, we mailed them gifts, but as they grew older, we realized that taking them to get something they wanted was a better idea. When we visit them during Thanksgiving weekend, we go to the mall and they pick out what they want. The practical side of me appreciates that I don’t have to make the decision of what to buy for these young men. 

Today, we don’t get a tree. We usually get a wreath for its pine scent and I take out my Christmas music boxes and put out a few other decorations. I’ve given away some of the ornaments - I kept the personalized ones -  and the Christmas tree lights. And yesterday, as I was filled with nostalgia,  I realized that there was another activity that used to mark the start of the holiday season in our family - baking cookies. Selecting the recipes, buying the ingredients, preparing everything, assigning different tasks to each son, singing along to Christmas music, the wonderful smell that filled the air - what a wonderful memory! So yesterday, I baked cookies for the first time in many years, 

We will be celebrating today with family and friends at my sister’s home. We are now the older generation, keeping up traditions that our parents started, gathering together and enjoying each other’s company at this special time of the year. We'll probably play some trivia games, maybe sing some carols, and probably watch some football games since this is the last week of Fantasy Football. Mostly, though, we'll just enjoy each other's company. 

Wishing all of you a wonderful holiday!

We are a Nation of Immigrants

“Give me your tired, your poor;

Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free.”

(from Emma Lazarus’ sonnet “The New Colossus” inscribed on a plaque at the Statue of Liberty)

Last year, I saw the Statue of Liberty for the very first time. We were on a trip to New York City with our son and teenage grandsons and took a tour to see Lady Liberty and Ellis Island. It was a humbling and inspirational experience. 

A few years ago when I was a principal, I visited a fourth grade classroom where they were in a discussion about immigration as part of their social studies unit, studying the wave of immigration to Hawai’i. At the time, the news was focused on the plight of the Syrian refugees, and the teacher saw this as an opportunity to expand the unit beyond a period of time in Hawaii’s history to what was happening in the world. Students learned about push and pull factors that impacted immigration and agreed on a question that would drive their research and discussions: Will immigration last forever? Why or why not? Those fourth graders learned how immigration to Hawai`i transformed our islands, making us the most multicultural state in our country. They made that connection to the world, agreeing that immigration would indeed last forever due to push and pull factors as well as events that impact people’s lives.

Unless someone is Native American or Native Hawaiian, their ancestors came to our country from somewhere else. Most of us are immigrants or descendents of immigrants. The Pilgrims themselves were immigrants, fleeing religious persecution in England and eventually crossing the Atlantic Ocean to settle in America. There are many other examples. A potato famine in Ireland led to over 1 million Irish immigrants entering our country.  Chinese laborers were recruited to build the transcontinental railroad system. Jews from Eastern Europe and Russia came to America to escape discrimination and violence. Cubans fled to our country after the Cuban Revolution. Recent refugees from Central America and countries like Iraq, Syria, and Afghanistan sought asylum due to war and instability in their countries. And others came to our country for educational or economic opportunities. 

My ancestors emigrated to Hawai`i from Japan in the 1890's. At the time, Hawai`i was a nation, and Japan was transitioning from feudalism to Westernization. This led to economic instability especially in rural areas. So when King Kalakaua offered contracts to work on the sugar or pineapple plantations in Hawai`i, many men took the offer. It was very challenging with long hours, backbreaking work, poor pay, and terrible working conditions, but our ancestors persevered, believing that Hawai`i would offer more opportunities for their children. Their work ethic was drilled into our generation from a young age. We were constantly reminded that if we studied and worked hard, we would have many more opportunities than what our ancestors had. I owe much to our immigrant ancestors.

My family’s story is not unique. American has been called “The Land of Opportunity” because it offered possibility. From the first immigrants to those who come today, people hope for a brighter future in our country. If we remember why people emigrated to our country - to escape hunger or persecution or a feeling of hopelessness - it is difficult to dismiss those who come to our country today for the same reasons. The question we must address is “Do we meet the challenges of immigration with compassion or with fear?” 

I’ve been reflecting on that fourth grade class and the honest discussions that took place between students and the teacher. And I wonder how many classrooms today are having discussions about important topics like immigration. Our students need to be informed citizens, able to see a challenging topic as an opportunity to engage in research, discussions, and the realization that there can be a difference of opinion, and that our personal experiences can impact one’s viewpoint. Those fourth grade students are now in high school and will be of voting age in a few years. I am hoping that they continue to be informed citizens, to look at issues with a wider lens, and can empathize with those who may be experiencing challenges or who have different viewpoints.

This was at the entry to the ferry tour to the Statue of Liberty. I asked our grandsons “Why would immigrants come to our country and what has been the impact of immigration? 

This tour was one of the highlights of our trip to New York City. 

Our country is unique because of our diversity. We are a nation of immigrants; that is who we are, that is our history. I hope we can agree that the issue of immigration should be met with compassion and not with fear.