Where is the Respect?

I was watching a candidate forum and the question came up about whether a candidate agreed with the policies of the President. The candidate went on to dodge the question by saying that she respects the office of the President.

I have tried not to make this blog political, but I have decided that if I keep quiet, it might be assumed that I don't have an opinion. I do. I, too, respect the office of the President, but when that person is so disrespectful to others, it is very difficult to justify that behavior.

As a school principal, our staff didn't always agree with our decisions, but the rational way to deal with that was to have open, collaborative discussions to try to resolve our differences of opinion.We may not have come to a win-win, but treating others' ideas with respect is essential to move forward on our vision for the school. Imagine if I ridiculed or put-down our staff for sharing their ideas. There would be a negative ripple effect with staff and students. If the principal treats the staff with disrespect, we would soon see the staff treating the students with disrespect. Then students would be disrespectful to the staff and to their fellow students.

Improving the culture of the workplace is a goal that schools constantly work on. When the adults like each other, they will more likely work together as a team to support the students. A negative school climate is toxic, and teaching and learning will be negatively impacted.

At a school, it starts at the top with the principal and trickles down to the staff and students and the school community. As a principal, if I ever resorted to name-calling or ridiculing someone, there would have been a complaint then an investigation, and I would likely be removed from my position.

As adults, it is up to us to teach our students right from wrong. Studies show that social-emotional learning is essential to developing positive behaviors in students, and that is why schools make time during the day to teach students to advocate for themselves, to treat others respectfully, and to work cooperatively with their peers. And yes, we need to have discussions with students when they question the disrespectful behaviors of their leaders. We need to teach them how to disagree respectfully without resorting to name-calling or ridiculing those with different opinions. It is important for us to honor our students' opinions and to let them know that they can speak up when they disagree with someone's behavior or name-calling, even if that person is the leader of our country.

Are You Bored Yet?

It's been a little over three months since I officially retired after working for 45 years as an educator -- 27 years as a classroom teacher and 18 years as an administrator. A common question I'm asked these days is "Are you bored yet?" to which I respond, "No." "Well, what do you do all day?" is the next question. Hmm . . . let's see, I go to the gym, I take our dog out for walks, I work around the house or I work in the yard. I read or I write. I have appointments. I plan for upcoming events. People look at me a bit strangely as if they're thinking to themselves, "That sounds so boring!"

Today marks the end of the first quarter for public schools in Hawaii. If I were sitting around the house with nothing to do, I would definitely be feeling it now. I loved my job right up until the day I retired. I loved the people I worked with; I loved the students; I loved the challenges; and I really loved making a difference in people's lives. But once I retired and turned the responsibility of leading the school to the new principal, I chose not to look back with regret. 

I made a resolution of sorts that every weekday, I would do at least one chore so that on the weekend, I can relax. So every day, I do something like vacuuming, weeding, doing laundry, going through cabinets or drawers and purging or organizing, washing the car, cleaning windows, or working in the yard. I figure that after a few months, I should be caught up and after that, it should be easier to maintain.

After completing my task-of-the-day, I am free to do whatever I want until Randy comes home from work. Sometimes I binge-read. I've read so many great books since I retired! Other times I go shopping although I don't really need much of anything now that I'm not working. I might pick up my Mom and take her somewhere; she is almost 91 years old and lives by herself so I know she enjoys the company. I realize that for once in my life, what I do is my choice and not dictated by by schedule as a student or a wife or a parent or a teacher or a principal.

There may be educational opportunities for me in the future. I will think carefully before making a decision. As a lifelong educator in Hawaii, I believe I still have something to offer. For now, though, this retirement has been exactly what I needed.