So Many Memories

 Our Mom passed away peacefully at her home on May 14, 2024. She was 96 years old at the time, and my siblings and I have been navigating the cleaning up of her home while we ponder our next steps. We knew this day would come eventually, and it’s not been easy.

Mom was a private person. As I shared in this blog from October 2015, Mom was special; she helped to shape my siblings and me into the people we are today. When Mom and Dad became grandparents, their home became the place-to-be on special holidays, for celebrations,  or for “corn parties” when Dad’s crop was ready to be harvested. These get-togethers were filled with stories and laughter and catching-up. We saw the grandchildren - our kids - grow up together as lifelong friends as well as cousins. Then these kids grew up and had kids of their own. Our family home that Mom and Dad bought back in 1969 was filled with even more laughter. 

Dad passed away in 2013 (Aloha, Dad). Since then, Mom lived alone in that 5-bedroom home. As she grew older, my siblings and I took turns spending time with her; we needed to watch her more carefully as she became less independent. And now, as we go through her drawers and closets, we’re getting an even greater insight about what made our Mom tick.

Mom loved her family, and as I cleaned out her desk drawers, I came across so many greeting cards and thank-you cards.  I hope Mom occasionally took them out to re-read because they were filled with sweet thoughts of appreciation and love. Mom and Dad also read the newspaper from front to back every day, I was surprised that she had cut out and saved articles written about or by her children and grandchildren and kept them in binders or file folders. As my siblings and I go over to clean and purge, we sometimes get caught up, looking through Mom’s photo albums or going through her scrapbooks. 

I know that especially in the later years, it was difficult to think of what to get Mom for her birthday, Mothers’ Day, or Christmas. As we clean, we are finding unused gift cards, brand-new items that were unwrapped but never used, clothes with the price tags still intact, and other well-meaning gifts that Mom never had the opportunity to use or enjoy. We are donating many of these items to charity, and we hope they will be enjoyed by those who receive them. 

We are encouraging our children (Mom’s grandchildren) to go through Mom’s items and to take things that they want or that remind them of her.  Three items I took from Mom’s home are a bracelet that the ladies at Wahiawa General Hospital made for newborns; our last name is misspelled, but I love that Mom kept all five of our bracelets. I also took my baby book; Mom had taped a penny from the year I was born on the first page and recorded my milestones including my first photograph. And I took my Dad’s bento-pail, his lunchbox, the one he took to work in the pineapple fields when they first got married. It was tucked way in the back of the kitchen cabinet What a find!

Mom and Dad bought their home when I was a senior in high school so I didn’t spend too many years there before getting married and starting our own family in our own home. Now that Mom and Dad have both passed, I know another family will move in and make their own memories in that special place. It would be impossible for me to share everything about what Mom and Dad’s home has meant to our extended family, and time has a way of moving on whether we like it or not. But I am grateful for all of the wonderful memories of Mom and Dad’s home, and I am hopeful that the next family will feel the love that we all shared in that special place. 

The bracelet that the volunteers made for newborns at Wahiawa General Hospital. The name is misspelled - it should be AMEMIYA - but it is nevertheless, a very special keepsake.

I knew Mom had a book for each of us, so when I became a Mom, I kept one for each of our sons. 

Dad’s bento (lunch) pail that he took to work when he worked as a laborer in the pineapple fields. 

It is still in great condition!